5 Random Thoughts on Life in Syria
1.
Socks!!! I don’t know why, but I find that everyone is trying to sell me socks on the streets of Damascus. I’ve never been anywhere where socks are so readily available. I’m always confronted with little old men, chain-smoking and trying to hawk socks. I’ve bought a few pairs. Not bad.
2.
I went to a very nice restaurant recently and noticed something rather odd. The restaurant is pretty ‘high-class’ and I even know some kids from Austria who saw the Syrian President dining with his family at this place – point being that this place isn’t Applebee’s or some shithole. Anyway, we finish a great meal and the always-hovering ‘staff’ begins to clear the table. In some ‘fine dining establishments’ in the States I’ve seen waiters with ‘crumbers’ these little things that quietly pick up bits of food on the table. Well, this restaurant doesn’t do ‘quietly’ . . . after we finished our meal (which was amazing by the way – the food here is by and large good, I’ve been impressed) I noticed this waiter with a ‘dust-buster’ in hand. Yes, dear reader, he DUST-BUSTED the table of loose crumbs. It was very loud and I was beyond entertained. I love this kind of stuff.
3.
Straws. I don’t know why – but Syrians seem to love straws. Maybe this is more common all over the world and this isn’t a Syrian or even a Middle East thing – I don’t know. I do know this: waiters in restaurants look at me like I’m a freak-show when I don’t use my straw. Even if I only bought a soft drink in a store, I find that the man behind the counter tries (in vain) to give me a straw. I hate using straws in ‘open’ containers. If I’ve got a lid, sure, gimme a straw. Milkshakes – okay, I can see the need of a straw there. But a straw for everything? Not into it.
4.
Eyebrows up, sometimes accompanied by a click of the mouth means NO: I’ve been here a few months and I’m sometimes still a bit slow to read this one. I’ll say a destination to a cab-driver and rather than saying “No” in Arabic or shaking his head, he’ll give me a “eyebrows-up-whatever-look” and sometimes it takes me a few beats to recognize that he said “No – I’m not going that way.” From what I understand, this is a Syrian thing, rather than the spread across the whole Arab world. I can’t wait to take this back to America and offend strangers and friends.
5.
Sometimes when I’m chatting with Syrians, not necessarily friends but random people in restaurants, shops, cabs, etc., I’m confronted with “Which is better?” question. “Are the girls prettier here or in America?” “Do you like America or Syria more?” I hate this line of questioning. I don’t want to measure these things and even if I did, I wouldn’t know what criteria to use. I mean, what would I say? . . . . . . . . YES! I’ve found that Syrian woman score higher on the beauty per-cubic inch index than their American counter-parts? Or, I like America more because the soft-serve ice cream is 2.3 times better in terms of richness and smoothness when compared to leading Syrian vendors?
Socks!!! I don’t know why, but I find that everyone is trying to sell me socks on the streets of Damascus. I’ve never been anywhere where socks are so readily available. I’m always confronted with little old men, chain-smoking and trying to hawk socks. I’ve bought a few pairs. Not bad.
2.
I went to a very nice restaurant recently and noticed something rather odd. The restaurant is pretty ‘high-class’ and I even know some kids from Austria who saw the Syrian President dining with his family at this place – point being that this place isn’t Applebee’s or some shithole. Anyway, we finish a great meal and the always-hovering ‘staff’ begins to clear the table. In some ‘fine dining establishments’ in the States I’ve seen waiters with ‘crumbers’ these little things that quietly pick up bits of food on the table. Well, this restaurant doesn’t do ‘quietly’ . . . after we finished our meal (which was amazing by the way – the food here is by and large good, I’ve been impressed) I noticed this waiter with a ‘dust-buster’ in hand. Yes, dear reader, he DUST-BUSTED the table of loose crumbs. It was very loud and I was beyond entertained. I love this kind of stuff.
3.
Straws. I don’t know why – but Syrians seem to love straws. Maybe this is more common all over the world and this isn’t a Syrian or even a Middle East thing – I don’t know. I do know this: waiters in restaurants look at me like I’m a freak-show when I don’t use my straw. Even if I only bought a soft drink in a store, I find that the man behind the counter tries (in vain) to give me a straw. I hate using straws in ‘open’ containers. If I’ve got a lid, sure, gimme a straw. Milkshakes – okay, I can see the need of a straw there. But a straw for everything? Not into it.
4.
Eyebrows up, sometimes accompanied by a click of the mouth means NO: I’ve been here a few months and I’m sometimes still a bit slow to read this one. I’ll say a destination to a cab-driver and rather than saying “No” in Arabic or shaking his head, he’ll give me a “eyebrows-up-whatever-look” and sometimes it takes me a few beats to recognize that he said “No – I’m not going that way.” From what I understand, this is a Syrian thing, rather than the spread across the whole Arab world. I can’t wait to take this back to America and offend strangers and friends.
5.
Sometimes when I’m chatting with Syrians, not necessarily friends but random people in restaurants, shops, cabs, etc., I’m confronted with “Which is better?” question. “Are the girls prettier here or in America?” “Do you like America or Syria more?” I hate this line of questioning. I don’t want to measure these things and even if I did, I wouldn’t know what criteria to use. I mean, what would I say? . . . . . . . . YES! I’ve found that Syrian woman score higher on the beauty per-cubic inch index than their American counter-parts? Or, I like America more because the soft-serve ice cream is 2.3 times better in terms of richness and smoothness when compared to leading Syrian vendors?
posted by Kicky Sack at 9:17 PM
3 Comments:
LOL.. awesome post.
I guess it's because it outlines all these things that I take for granted, or as being "normal"
I'm in Canada now, and I still use the eyebrow life you mentioned. I assumed everybody used it. I guess I was wrong
Syrians like to be liked and to be competetive ,they just want your freindship and president Bush,s too.
Amen on everything you said.
How did I not find your blog earlier?? Shukran, Syria Planet.
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